Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Republic of potassium

 I did no such thing!!

No, wait! Let me put that on my face!

I didn't say these words. But if you looked deep into my eyes this morning at the breakfast table, you'd have heard my soul cry out for a beggarly bit of a sloppy fruit.

Breakfast time. We're at the table.

My grandfather and his knife were slowly, slowly ensuring slices of a wobbly, blackened banana (that I wanted to slather on my face as a pack) were landing right in his bowl of porridge topped with strawberry flavoured god awful Kellogs cornflakes.

Who eats that?!

HE eats that.

He even eats dessert in the same bowl as his dahi/curd and I don't judge, I don't pooh-pooh. I don't judge or pooh-pooh because it's um, rude plus something I've picked up. He's a foodie. From the school of thought called why waste it. Why dirty another dish. Why waste more water. The strawberry and porridge and rotting bananas -- it's his happy place. Mine descend from there. No poohing.

Granddaddy seemed to think banana episode was needling me. Maybe he thought I didn't want him to eat a dirty black b'nana, when really, all I wanted was a little piece of dirty black b'nana to massage my face with.

He: Rich in nutrients, Swami ji used to say -- and eat only the most sada hua kelas, the blackest of the black.

Me: Yea yea, very good. Now are you saving me the last bit of the rotten fruit or not?

Nope.. Swami ji tales continued, entire banana sliced, nothing for my face.

I just hope these sacrifices being made in the name of respecting elders isn't going unnoticed by the big fruit fly in the sky.

Note to self. Next time, swoop and snatch, baby, SWOOP and snatch!

8 comments:

Perakath said...

I'm intrigued by the title. Is it some reference I miss?

(The plantain would've preferred your face too, I'm sure.)

Nimpipi said...

Na na, you didn't miss nothing. It's all me taking liberties to chat inchoate shit: banana republic.. banana has potassium.. republic of .. made me giggle. seemed like reason enough.

I guess when writers of how-to-write books say sleep on a post they know what they're talking about. no plantains for them!

Between you and I, this blogging like a fiend -- 'from quantity will emerge quality', my ass! -- has it's downside. Better find a job soon. Or take up gibberish writing full time. This promise to write more needs breaking. Says the blogger to the non blogger.

Anonymous said...

..dragged all the way from reader to the post wanting to comment "lame"..
but saw your selfFlagellation and was tongueTied.
So quote as improv now-
"None of us at any time in our lives must allow the mere fact that we do not know what we are doing to dampen our enthusiasm in any way."
a.lurker

Nimpipi said...

Anon Lurk: Eeks! I suppose I asked for it. Shames me that what made you drag yourself all the way from reader to here was wanting to give me a whipping.

It shall henceforth be my endeavour to be less lame. I was going to prefix an as much as it pains me to say this.. but then realised no more pain than it pained me to post that. So heh. Done. Less lame. Enthusiasm no excuse. And then when I am good, and on a roll, you can still drag yourself here and not need to kick my ass. How's that for self flagellation? =)

Ramit Grover said...

You use bananas for a face pack?

Like really?

Nimpipi said...

Tbg dgc: nooo.. just the bald guy was soo much more fun!

But, yes, really. Banana = beautiful. Next stop avocados.

Ellie said...

'the big fruit in the sky' = priceless! Hahahhaaaaahaaa.

Anonymous said...

there's that thought again.. "too bad you're taken."
OK think shld use that mailID for such non germane pours ;)
.. esp. since talk of derrieres by fast talking woodchucks unhinges the shallow mind.You've no idea what dark recesses of society your posts are popping up in. (j/k)

you really chuck well.yes.

-still.lurking