Departure and revival

I have a ticket confirming my return to Delhi this Saturday. I'm moving back. Home sweet home, Dilli O Dilli, mummy daddy mein aa gayi , doston, galle milo, etc etc.

And so I think it may not be a bad idea to inhale, and really get into retrospection mode here for a bit.

[Claps for the lights to dim, looks down and frowns at the cigarette now lit]

What a short stint, is right. I've been getting the "you're going back?? already?! But you just came!" Yea well.. ; and so I've been shielding myself spouting convincing stuff like, "I can't help it if I packed into fewer months what most put into a year." Riiight, they say slowly. Some, of course, will nod admiringly and admit to my innate superiority, but these, I have to admit, are the minority.

Hang down your head Tom Doo-ooley,

hang down your head and cryy...

Alright, here's the truth: I don't mind Bombay. On days, say six a week, I even like it. Then again, I don't mind Delhi. I prefer the food in Bombay though. I shall miss roadside sandwich places. Apparently the ones without onions (and potatoes/ kandha-batata) are called Jain sandwiches. (Where else are you supposed to scavenge for trivia if not from an indecisive blog?)

Back to the truth, other than being an escapist, I don't have a reason. I'm still going back-- sure, it's just the Whys that are hanging. Do I hate my job? No, only my boss a little. Am I unhappy with where I'm staying? Yes, but then I moved out. Do I not have enough friends here? I don't know about enough, but there are 3-4 pillars that've stuck nicely, and to them I send flying kissies.

Which then leaves me nowhere. Maybe its boyfriend issues. And that I might've stuck on if there was something truly fruitful unwrapping itself here. Tentative statement which could perhaps do with some backspacing, but for -- and even if just -- the decimal-size truth to it. Not that there are options just waiting to be explored back home, but I'm all for change of scene. And that is probably what it boils down to: being easily bored. Not being able to appreciate things for too long, dissatisfaction, and a permanent yawn.

Chances are Delhi won't be too different, either from Bombay or what I've earlier known it to be. Same family-work-gossip-laughter-traffic-tears-friends-sex-food-phone cycle, and days that go by being centred around combinations of these, with an occasional yearning for more.